What I Missed At Trump-Con, Day 2

The first night was Fear Night.  The second was Hillary Hate Night, because no one really likes Trump, so let's unite in Hillary Hate.

Sympathy For the Devil.  Ben Carson was aroused from his slumbers long enough to assert that Hillary is a big fan of Lucifer.  Hate her.

Also, Hillary caused Boko Haram to kidnap hundreds of girls in Nigeria.  Hate her.

Hillary is a criminal.  Hate her.

Hillary is a pig.  Hate her.

Curb Your Enthusiasm.  Mitch "Yertle" McConnell and Paul "Smallnuts" Ryan both extolled the virtues of "our nominee -- what's-his-name, the guy with the hair who yells a lot."

Donald Trump Jr. continued the family tradition of irony-free public appearances (and long greasy hair).  Donnie Jr. maintained that "fancy colleges and degrees and MBA's" are for losers.  (Both Donnie Jr. and his father were in the MBA program at Wharton.)

"I was born a poor black child."

And Donnie Jr. thought we should know that, "It has not been easy for me.  I started off and my father gave me a small loan of a million dollars."

Yessir, Junior, that's hard times.  Very few of us would consider a loan of a million dollars "small."  Very few of us have a father capable of lending us a million bucks.  Junior, you're just a regular Joe Baggadonuts.
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Once again, I happily missed all of the above!