Welcome to Buster's Blog

Irregular commentary on whatever's on my mind -- politics, sports, current events, and life in general. After twenty years of writing business and community newsletters, fifteen years of fantasy baseball newsletters, and two years of email "columns", this is, I suppose, the inevitable result: the awful conceit that someone might actually care to read what I have to say. Posts may be added often, rarely, or never again. As always, my mood and motivation are unpredictable.

Buster Gammons

Thursday, February 9, 2017

DeVos Comes Into Contact With Book For First Time

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) -- On her inaugural day as the Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos came into contact with a book for the very first time in her life.

Cameras were present to capture the historic moment, as DeVos extended her left hand tentatively and eventually touched the foreign object.

After touching the book for approximately one minute, DeVos quickly withdrew her hand and appeared drained by the experience.

"It was not as bad as I thought it would be, to tell you the truth," DeVos said.  "After all these years, it turns out it was nothing to be scared of."

DeVos said she "might touch another book" in the future but gave no specific indication of when that might occur.

Across the nation, millions of Americans reacted to DeVos's confirmation by requesting vouchers that would enable them to select an Education Secretary of their own choosing.

-- Andy Borowitz, newyorker.com 

No comments:

Post a Comment