Les Moonves, Teller Of The Awful Truth (With A Chaser Of George Carlin)

Leslie Moonves is the CEO and Chairman of the Columbia Broadcasting System, CBS.  Speaking yesterday to the Morgan Stanley Tech/Media/Telecom Conference in San Francisco, here's what Moonves had to say:

"[Coverage of Donald Drumpf] may not be good for America, but it's damn good for CBS.  The money is rolling in.  Bring it on, Donald.  Keep going."

That breeze you feel is Edward R. Murrow and Walter Cronkite spinning in their graves.

The devolution of 'Murica has reached the point where the CEO of what was once among the most respected news-gathering organizations in the world now freely admits that he just doesn't give a shit about journalistic integrity anymore.  And it's not just CBS -- Moonves has plenty of company across the media spectrum.  Forget genuine information and analysis, forget the duty to distinguish truth from fiction, wheat from chaff -- just keep the cash comin', and don't ask Donald a tough question.  You might break the spell.

Ratings, circulation, ad revenue, eyeballs, hits, likes, shares, retweets -- I guess getting those numbers cheaply, easily, has always been the main thing for media companies.  But in the pursuit of the lowest common denominator, is there such a thing as too low, too dumb?  Real Housewives?  Swamp People?  Kardashians?  The Apprentice?  Donald J. Drumpf as President? 

Have we become dumb enough for that?
________________________________________

I fondly recall the late, great George Carlin, who believed America was dumb enough for anything.  In one of his old bits, he discussed the dumb inevitability of an All-Suicide TV Channel.  Think of the ratings!  Sort of like All-Trump TV.

All Suicide, All the Time

Suicide would be a natural on television.  You could have an all-suicide channel.  On cable TV.  I’ll bet it’ll happen.  Shit, they’ve got all-golf.  What the fuck?  Must-die TV!

People would compete for Most Unusual Method:  They’d be jumpin’ off of barns, lightin’ themselves on fire, puttin’ rat poison on a taco, drinkin’ Mop & Glo, stickin’ mothballs up their ass. 

During sweeps months, on the All-Suicide channel, you’re gonna have to go with mass suicides.  Huge, public events, on live television, where hundreds of people kill themselves all at the same time.

I’m convinced that in this depraved culture that so devalues human life and dignity, and where “reality” television has convinced everyone they belong on national TV, I’m convinced that if you added in the excitement of a brand-new All-Suicide Channel debuting with maximum publicity, you could get five hundred of these hopeless people to hold hands and jump into the Grand Canyon.

If you really want to raise the profile of this promotion – if you really want to attract attention – get a bunch of those evangelical Christians to participate and call it “Jump For Jesus!”  They’d go for it in a minute.  “Jump For Jesus!”

When I think about suicide and network television, I’m thinkin’ Fox!  I’m tellin’ you, if the people at Fox ain’t sittin’ around having meetings on an idea like this, they ain’t doin’ their goddamn jobs over there.