One Hour Of Network TV

The "vast wasteland" of broadcast television becomes more waste-filled all the time, yet certain habits linger for me.  Most evenings, I fix a drink and, from 6:30 to 7:30, I watch the network news, followed by Jeopardy.  (Always just one big gay whirl at the Buster Gammons estate.)

Last night, on a whim, I decided to log every single commercial that appeared during that one-hour time span.  I was watching my local CBS affiliate.  Here's the list:

In order, the 16 ad spots from the CBS Evening News:
Dulera -- asthma medication
Publishers Clearinghouse -- sweepstakes contest
Cialis -- erectile dysfunction medication
Tena -- adult diapers
Panera Bread restaurants
Aleve -- pain reliever
Gold Bond Eczema Relief Cream
HepCHope.com/Gilead Sciences -- hepatitis treatment
Centrum Vitamins
Symbicort -- COPD medication
Osphena -- post-menopausal vaginal pain medication
Tums -- antacid
CBS This Morning -- TV show
I Lost A Bet.org -- website for problem gambling resources
Jeff Wyler Chevrolet -- car dealership
HealthCare.gov -- health insurance exchange website

In order, the 23 ad spots from Jeopardy:
Homes of Distinction -- homebuilder's tour
Tim Horton's restaurants
Toyota -- automaker
Columbus Auto Show
Hyundai -- automaker
Positive Changes Weight Loss Centers
Volkswagen -- automaker
Giant Eagle grocery stores
Chevy Trucks -- automaker
Positive Changes Weight Loss Centers (again)
E.B. Eggs
Celebrex -- arthritis medication
Orbitz -- travel website
Byers Kia -- car dealership
Donato's Pizza
Ford -- automaker
Speedway gas stations
Byers Kia (again) -- car dealership
Aleve -- pain reliever
Albolene -- cold cream/makeup remover
Bufferin -- pain reliever
GEICO -- auto insurance
Gold Bond Moisturizing Lotion

OK then.  Beyond being an exercise in pointless nothingness, what does this tell us?

1.  The purpose of broadcast TV has never been clearer:  39 ads in 60 minutes.  Some are very brief, maybe 5-10 seconds.  Others go up to 60 seconds.  But over the course of the hour, I was exposed to an ad message every 1.54 minutes on average.

2.  The advertisers on the CBS News believe that I'm old and suffering from a whole host of physical problems that can be eased with Big Pharma products.  The large majority of ads -- 11 of 16, or 69% -- during the news were for medications and health care issues.

3.  Advertisers on Jeopardy are a more diverse bunch.  Leading the pack were ads for car sales, with 8 of 23, or 35%.  But they're still pretty sure I'm kinda sick, and probably fat and ugly too, so ads for health care and beauty products came in a close second at 6 of 23, or 26%.

From 6:30 to 7:00, they want me to see my doctor immediately.
From 7:00 to 7:30, they'd like me to buy a car first, then drive straight to the drugstore.