Deep Thoughts

(Provided by a faithful reader. Thanks, Faithful Reader!)

10 THOUGHTS TO PONDER

10. Life is sexually transmitted.

9. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

8. Men have two emotions -- hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

7. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

6. Some people are like Slinkys -- not really good for anything, but it's still fun to shove them down the stairs.

5. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals, dying of nothing.

4. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

3. Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800, and a substantial tax cut save you $30?

2. In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought: Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers -- what you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

. . . and as someone recently said to me, "Don't worry about old age -- it doesn't last that long."