Welcome to Buster's Blog

Irregular commentary on whatever's on my mind -- politics, sports, current events, and life in general. After twenty years of writing business and community newsletters, fifteen years of fantasy baseball newsletters, and two years of email "columns", this is, I suppose, the inevitable result: the awful conceit that someone might actually care to read what I have to say. Posts may be added often, rarely, or never again. As always, my mood and motivation are unpredictable.

Buster Gammons















Thursday, December 20, 2018

Buster's Christmas Collection


Here are a few new ones:








































































And some classic re-posts:

Buster Wishes You Happy Humorous Holidays!


What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. -- Phyllis Diller

Santa Claus has the right idea.  Visit people once a year. -- Victor Borge

I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas.  I took it to the Gift Wrap Dept. and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he'd know when to stop unwrapping. -- Steven Wright 

Most Texans think Hanukkah is some sort of duck call. -- Richard Lewis

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. -- George Carlin

I once wanted to be an atheist, but I gave up -- they have no holidays. -- Henny Youngman

Dear Santa, I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty . . . and it was worth it, you fat judgmental bastard! -- Anonymous

There are 3 stages of man:  He believes in Santa Claus;  He does not believe in Santa Claus;  He is Santa Claus. -- Bob Phillips

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. -- Garrison Keillor

Where do you think you're going?  Nobody's leaving.  Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned, family Christmas.  No, no!  We're all in this together.  This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here! -- Clark Griswold

The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk.  This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. -- P.J. O'Rourke

How To Greet Me During The Holidays



I’m inviting all my friends and family to greet me however they jolly well please during this holiday season, and I will do the same.  Let’s remember that the Christmas season often coincides with other celebrations, so to each his own, and Happy Holidays to everyone!

I wish you a Merry Christmas, a Happy Hannukah, a Kwazy Kwanzaa, a Rockin’ Ramadan, a Tremendous Tet, a Super Solstice, and a Festivus for the rest of us!



Tom Lehrer's "Christmas Carol"

Tom Lehrer, a musical comedian popular in the 1950's and 1960's, was one my dad's favorites.  Mine too.  One of Lehrer's best was his satiric "Christmas Carol".

A couple years ago, I posted just the lyrics, which have cracked me up for decades.  This year, let's hear the music too:



A Christmas Classic: "Six To Eight Black Men" By David Sedaris


This has become a seasonal favorite of mine.  I try to listen to it at least once a year.  It never gets old.

Sedaris
It's David Sedaris reading his monologue, "Six to Eight Black Men."  Thanks go to my sister for making me aware of it awhile ago.  I initially posted this in 2011, but Sedaris first wrote and performed it in the early 2000's, I think.

Watch all three in a row.  It's fifteen minutes well-spent.







As Always, Buster Wishes You A Merry Christmas!



And a happy, humorous New Year!



































































































































































And speaking of the New Year, here's one more:






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