You Shall Know Them By The Company They Keep

And by the endorsements they receive.  Just for fun, I checked Wikipedia for lists of all the endorsements garnered by the current presidential wanna-be's.  The sheer number of endorsements for the candidates is staggering (Hillary Clinton is the clear leader in total number), and will only grow as time moves on.

But I wasn't so interested in total numbers or endorsements from major newspapers or important politicians.  No, I was more attracted to celebrities, artists, losers, has-beens and other public figures who have stood up to support their personal favorites.

What do these sort of endorsements say about the candidates?  Beats me, but it's sure amusing!


THE REPUBLICANS

Donald Trump:  Sarah Palin, Jerry Falwell Jr., Joe Arpaio (racist asshole sherriff of Maricopa County, AZ), Ann Coulter (racist ultra-right media twat), Hulk Hogan, John Wayne's daughter Aissa, Tila Tequila (porn star, "singer", Nazi fan, flat-earther), Dennis Rodman, Ted Nugent, John Rocker (ex-MLB pitcher, racist, homophobe), Bobby Knight (retired basketball coach and infamous angry person)

Ted Cruz:  Rick Perry, Phil Robertson (Duck Dynasty douchebag), Bob Vander Plaats (CEO of Family leader, a conservative Christian group), U.S. Rep's Mark Meadows-NC and Steve King-IA (members of the Tea-Bag Freedom Caucus that caused the government shutdown)

Marco Rubio:  George Pataki (ex-NY Gov. and failed presidential candidate), Sen. James Inhofe, R-OK (snowball holder, climate change denier), Rick Harrison (Pawn Stars), Jenna Jameson (porn star)

Ben Carson:  Kirk Cameron (ex-actor, douchebag conservative Christian), Kid Rock, Mickey Rourke

Jeb Bush:  Sen. Lindsey Graham (failed presidential candidate), Toby Keith, Mommy & Daddy and all their old friends

Chris Christie:  Maine Gov. Paul LePage (racist moron concerned about out-of-state drug dealers knocking up Maine's white girls), Hewlett Packard CEO Meg Whitman (What? No Carly?), Augie Busch III (Anheuser Busch)

Rand Paul:  Alex Jones (far-right conspiracy theory crackpot radio host), Belle Knox (porn star), Vince Vaughn

John Kasich:  Tim Allen, Charles Barkley (Sir Charles, that's just turrrible!)

Mike Huckabee:  Kenneth Copeland (televangelist and shyster), Chuck Norris

Carly Fiorina:  Donnie Wahlberg (the other Wahlberg brother)

Rick Santorum:  literally no one












THE DEMOCRATS

Hillary Clinton:  Tom Hanks, Jim Brown (best football player ever), Howard Stern, Elton John, Tony Bennett, Stevie Wonder, Carole King, Barbra Streisand, and a surprising number of rappers -- 50 Cent, ASAP Rocky, Luther Campbell and 2 Live Crew, Common, Ice-T, Rah Digga, Ja Rule, Snoop Dogg, Waka Flocka Flame, Kanye West, Will.i.am, Young Jeezy

Bernie Sanders:  Jesse Ventura (ex-wrestler, actor and MN Gov.), Danny DeVito, Seth McFarlane, Kareem Abdul Jabbar (most dominant basketball player ever), David Crosby, Graham Nash, Neil Young (where's Stephen Stills?), Art Garfunkel, and an equally impressive number of rappers (Bernie to Hillary: "My campaign will match yours rhyme for rhyme!") -- Big Boi, Tyler the Creator, Killer Mike, El-P, Bun-B, Lil B, Styles P, G-Eazy, Scarface, Spose, Fat Tony, Yung Skeeter

Martin O'Malley:  The Dropkick Murphys (O'Malleys or Murphys, the Irish stick together)









All I can get from this is that the Republicans have the porn stars and the Democrats have the rappers.  And Chuck Norris wants us to vote for Huckabee.  Just to be on the safe side, maybe we should do what Chuck says.