". . . With Liberty And Justice And Twinkies For All"

Some conservatives with a sense of humor (they do exist) have come up with a good one.  They've launched an official White House petition asking the President to nationalize Twinkies and "preserve our nation's sweet, creamy center."  It's a tongue-in-cheek gesture and ya gotta laugh, even though it's half joke, half insult.

After Hostess demanded concessions, its workers went on strike in November.  The company then promptly filed for bankruptcy for the second time since 2004.  Many right-leaners reacted predictably and simplistically, blaming the bakery workers union for the company's failure.  Since banks and carmakers were bailed out, isn't it cute then to ask Obama to nationalize Twinkies?  Well, sure.

(For the record, quickly:  In the '04 bankruptcy, Hostess forced big wage and benefit cuts, and plant closings.  Average annual pay went from $48,000 to $34,000.  In '12, the company wanted pay to fall to $25,000, with much larger out-of-pocket for health insurance.  The employees said no.  The company said fuck you, and 18,000 lost their jobs.  The company will sell off to new buyers, who will try to restructure without the union.  Capitalism can work well.  This was not one of those times.)

A Twinkie is the famous, non-nutrious, sort-of-delicious, spongy food-like substance with a half-life of a million years.  Many people love 'em.  So don't automatically pooh-pooh the idea of a nationalized snack cake.  Could be a smarter and happier use of government dollars than some of the stuff the Pentagon wants.    

And there could yet be some military purpose.  If you remove a Twinkie from its wrapper, it won't get moldy but it will eventually turn as hard as a rock.  Old Twinkies could be useful in artillery units.