The Best Excuse Ever!

During all the bickering before the recent budget agreement (the one that takes us through 2011, not Paul Ryan's ludicrous "Path To Prosperity", which is for 2012 and is DOA anyway), you might recall that Republicans tried to make the deal contingent on eliminating funding for Planned Parenthood. Sen. Jon Kyl (R, Ariz) argued for cutting them off, telling his fellow Senators in his gravest tone that, "Ninety percent of Planned Parenthood's expenditures are for abortions."

Turns out that Kyl was just a teeny bit off with his statistic -- like a margin of error of plus or minus 87 points! Planned Parenthood actually spends just 3% of its money on abortion.

A spokesman explained that "The Senator's statement was not intended to be factual."

Hot damn! That's the best excuse ever! Now we can all say bunches of ignorant things and engage in wild exaggerations and reckless behavior, and if someone objects, we're covered! It's beautiful, and there's no end to the usefulness of this technique:

"You see, Professor, all those wrong answers on my mid-term exam were not intended to be factual."

"All the degrees and experience on my resume? Not intended to be factual."

Richard Nixon: "All my comments captured on the Oval Office taping system? Not intended to be factual."

George W. Bush: "When I said 'Mission Accomplished', my words were not intended to be factual."

John Boehner: "Neither my tears nor my skin tone are intended to be factual."

"My tax return? Not intended to be factual."

"Honey, remember our wedding vows? Well, I didn't intend my statement to be factual."

"But Osh-ifer, my blood alcohol content ish not intended to be fak-shull, OK?"