Spoiled Child Alert! Unhinged Brooklyn Brat Running Amok!

Our Terrible Tyrannical Tot is bringing the mean, stupid and dangerous every day.

OMG, he sent a midnight all-caps threat tweet to Iran!  (Because lower-case is "SMALL" and "WEAK.")  But the Mullahs have seen Donnie's puerile provocateur act before, most recently with North Korea, and the Mullahs don't care.  And I once thought John McCain was too bellicose to be president.  Silly me.

Says he's looking into revoking the security clearance of any former government official who's ever dared to criticize his large gossamer-skinned ass.  On his shit list are Brennan, Clapper, Comey, Hayden, Rice, and McCabe.  Very petty, very vindictive, and very ignorant.  As retirees, none of them receive classified briefings anymore.  Quasimodo Huckabee Sanders says they've all "monetized their service" and she says the Grifter-In-Chief is shocked -- shocked! -- by this.  Mr. Refuses-To-Divest-From-His-Golf Courses-Hotels-Office Buildings said he would never monetize his service.  He added that he'll also look into posthumously revoking the security clearances of George C. Marshall, Henry Stimson and Ulysses S. Grant.

In an unprecedented move, he ordered his DOJ to release the FISA Court surveillance warrant for bucket-head Russia pawn Carter Page.  This action exposed our intel sources and outed the four previously-anonymous FISA judges, all Republicans, all of whom approved the Page warrant and renewed it three times.  Donnie Dumbass claims the released documents exonerate him in Mueller's Russia probe, and show it's all a rigged witch hunt hoax. It shows the exact opposite.

Honest Vlad Putin says he'd happily let us talk to the twelve Mueller-indicted Russian agents if only we'd let him have access to all of our intel sources -- so Vladi can ID them and kill them.  Novichok anyone?  The well-known idiot occupying the White House fell for it, calling it "an incredible offer."  I hope someone can 'splain to Boy Blunder just how truly incredible Putin's offer really is.

And in bimbo hush-money news, the FBI is in possession of a recording made by Michael Cohen in which Cohen and Donnie discuss the $150,000 payoff to former Playmate Karen McDougal.  Reportedly, the tape shows Trump wanted to just hand her a big bag of cash, but Cohen suggested that a check would be better.  For record-keeping purposes.  Ask Jerry Springer about the advisability of paying for a courtesan by check.  He-he!