Typical Sean Sphincter Press Briefing

Man-Baby President Plays With Missiles

Back in 2013, President Obama wanted Congress to authorize a U.S. military response to the Syrian government's gas attack on its own people.  From his hideaway in Twitter Tower, Citizen Trump warned against U.S. retaliation over and over again, and insisted that Obama would need Congressional approval.  Most Republicans on the hill were opposed, and no approval ever came.

During the campaign, Candidate Trump denounced Hillary Clinton's foreign policy, claiming she wanted "to start a shooting war in Syria in conflict with nuclear-armed Russia.  It could lead to World War III."

He campaigned on his "America First" platform and urged us to build closer ties to Vladimir Putin.

A week ago, Trump administration officials declared that "our priority is no longer getting Assad out" (Nikki Haley) and "the status of Assad will be decided by the Syrian people" (Rex Tillerson).

Captain Kangaroo has more military experience

And now?  With his insular administration in a state of constant upheaval, it's suddenly "Assad must go!" and Dress-Me-Up Donnie is wearing his military ballcap and firing missiles into Syria.  Just like that.  And without the necessary Congressional approval.

So, Hillary Clinton would stupidly start World War III, but President Donnybrook (who "knows more than the generals") will not.  Let's fervently hope not.

As someone who despises Syrian refugees, he's about to create a hell of a lot more of 'em.

For all his bloviation in one direction, to do a 180 course change -- with missiles! --is mind-boggling.  But Trump is a man without principles -- he lives moment to moment in the 24-7 news cycle, knees jerking and fingers flailing as he reacts to this and that.  He's not just unpredictable, he's unstable, unhinged.

Could this be the start of the Trumpocalypse?  

Trumposity

Trumposity, n. of or relating to Donnie's supreme cluelessness, ostentatiousness, and constant effort to dissemble, deflect and distract with made-up bullshit.


Recent examples:

Trump said he would not continue with Obama's "Assad must go" policy.  The Syrian dictator could stay in power, no problem.  (Essentially the Russian position.)  After that pronouncement, Syria promptly launched a deadly chemical attack on its own people.  Trump blamed it on Obama!  Then he back-pedaled.

To divert attention from the Russian election hacking probe, a month ago Trump came up with the lie that Obama had placed him under surveillance.  In support of that lie, he pulled another shiny object out of his ass -- his claim that Obama's National Security Adviser Susan Rice leaked the names of some Trump associates appearing in a foreign intelligence report, and that this constituted a crime.  A crime?  "Yes, I think."  Proof or evidence?  "Later, at the right time."  What exactly is her crime?  He couldn't say, but "it's going to be the biggest story."

Advertisers are bailing out, but Fox News renewed its contract with serial sexual harasser Bill O'Rapey.  (Roger Ailes taught him everything he knows.)  And to kick off Sexual Assault Awareness Month, Trump said O'Rapey was "a good person.  I don't think he did anything wrong."  (From one pussy-grabber to another.)

Special Presidential Assistant and daughter-wife Ivanka told an interviewer that she does indeed differ from Daddy Dearest on some issues, and she effectively and privately expresses her opinions to him.  But she will not do so publicly, on the record, and so "most people will not actually know about it."  (Ooh, that's effective!)  

Donald Lists His Friends

Sent by dear friend and reader Barb.  Very funny!  Thank you!
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It's all complete baloney until he gets to the very end.

Video: The Psychopathic Politician Blues

Sent by faithful reader and fellow blogger J.T.  Thanks, Joe!  This video is just marvelous!

"Sorry, I'll Be Golfing At Mar-A-Lago"

For the first time since 1910, the president will not throw out the ceremonial first pitch at an Opening Day baseball game.  Trump claims he has a scheduling conflict.  Puh-leeze!

Far more likely reasons that the man who once claimed to be, as a youth, "the best baseball player in New York" will not perform this traditional rite of spring:

• Mr. Pixie Fingers can no longer properly grasp the ball in his tiny little hands.
• When he did it in the past, he looked like he was taking a horrible shit.
• He's afraid of being publicly booed by 40,000 people at Nationals Park.
• He's scared of the numerous Mexican and Latino players on the rosters of both teams.

Our fearless leader is a frightened little weenie.

Bill O'Rapey

It is reported that over the years, Fox News has paid $13 million in hush money to five different women to settle sexual harrassment and abuse charges against Bill O'Reilly, the supposed bell cow of their primetime lineup.

How does this asshole keep his job?

"Beats me!"