Hair Twittler is soon to address the nation on his Afghanistan strategy. He's listening closely to "his generals" and is expected to call for an increase in troop levels. Big surprise. As surgeons believe in surgical solutions, generals believe in military ones.
We've seen this movie before, and I think it's Groundhog Day. Here's a post from seven years ago. A few names have changed, but that's about it.
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Thursday, July 29, 2010
Afghanistan: Same Old Shit, Different Day
Tick, tick, tick. Nine years and counting, and what have we accomplished?
In 2001, in an understandable but ill-conceived response to the 9/11 tragedy, Dubya took us charging into Afghanistan so we could catch that bastard Osama Bin Laden and drop a bomb on his head. Just missed him! Damn! But hey, while we're in the neighborhood, let's mess with Iraq!
Now it's 2010, Iraq has been liberated into a pile of rubble, Bin Laden is long gone, but we're still traipsing around in Afghanistan trying to find Al Qaeda bad guys.
General McCrystal is out for saying some stupid shit to a reporter and General Petraeus is back in. This will make absolutely no difference whatsoever.
An online outfit called Wikileaks released a bunch of classified documents that boil down to (1.) Most of our military personnel realize how hopeless our Afghan mission is, and (2.) Most of them feel that the Taliban, despite their penchant for cutting off noses, are far more trustworthy and far less corrupt than President Karzai. No surprises.
President Obama is sticking to his guns and will begin withdrawal of U.S. troops in 2011. For that, I give him credit. But I have to discredit his decision to not pull out even sooner. What good is another year in this fucking dump?
Look, Afghanistan is literally the planet's rectum, the end of the earth. It has no strategic value to anyone. It's a good place to hide, and that's about it. It's primitive, lawless, undeveloped, and brutal, and destined to stay that way. It's the one place in the world where people use the words "war lord" and they're not talking about a goddam video game. At the height of their power, both the British Empire and the Soviet Empire made military forays into Afghanistan and got their asses kicked. And we think we're gonna do better? The last guy who had any success at an Afghan conquest was Genghis Khan, but after a short stay, he got out too. After sampling the myriad pleasures of Afghanistan, Khan and his Hordes decided they preferred burning yak turds for heat back home in Mongolia, and so they split.
Our "war" in Afghanistan is unwinnable, and there's nothing to win anyway. Bring 'em home. Now.
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